Public Appearances:

How to Overcome Codependency and Low Self-Esteem by Darlene Lancer, MFT

Dealing with a Narcissist

Saturday, January 31, 2016

LA Performance Center. Watch a YouTube excerpt.

How To Raise Your Self-Esteem

Saturday, January 31, 2015 Santa Monica Ocean Park Library

Healing from Shame: Our Inner Saboteur

June 28 2014 Palms-Rancho Park Branch Library

Why Relationships Hurt

June 8, 2013 Marina Del Rey Library
June 23, 2012 L.A. Brentwood Library
June 30, 2012 Santa Monica Main Library
Listen to this talk on the symptoms, causes, and progression of Codependency.
Sept. 4, 2012 Westwood Library 
Sept. 29, 2012 Palms-Rancho Park Library
Nov. 13, 2012 West Hollywood Library
Dec. 13, 2012 Main Downtown Library
February 9, 2013 Culver City Library

For Professionals


Does Our Codependency Help or Hurt Our Clients?

March 27, 2013 The Matrix Institute
June 3, 2013 The Maple Center
Aug. 2, 2012 Antioch Counseling Center
Sept. 28, 2012 Southern Calif. Counseling Center 
Nov. 1, 2012 Cedars-Sinai Medical Center. Watch an excerpt on YouTube.
Sept. 20, 2013 Goodtherapy Seminar; Codependency and Countertransference. For CEU’s, listen to seminar at
May 18, 2014 NAATP Convention, Charlotte, N.C.

Understanding and Treating Shame

July, 2014 Sierra-Tucson; Shame and Codependency. Watch an excerpt on YouTube.
May 30, 2014 WCSAD Conference

Learn more, and download the full webinar, Understanding and Treating Shame.

Peer-reviewed articles:

Shame – the Elephant in the Room” published in Social Work Today

“Does Our Codependency Help or Harm Our Clients?” and “The Problem of Narcissists” published in The Therapist – also under Articles.

Media Interviews

July 15, 2016 Put the “I” in Independence. Interview about autonomy and how to achieve it with Kristin Walker.

July 5, 2016 Relationship Dynamics with Narcissists-How to Detach and Communicate. Interview with Colleen Mullen.

June 15, 2016 Voice of America – Empowerment. Interview  about Self-Esteem and Codependency with Tamara Neal.

May 2, 2016 Codependency Symptoms and Emptiness, Recovery Today Seminar – Interview with Sherry Gaba or watch on YouTube.

February 9, 2016 Dealing with a Narcissist: 8 Steps to Raise Self-Esteem and Set Boundaries with Difficult People – Interview with Randi Fine.

April 12, 2016 Overcoming Codependent Guilt and ShameInterview with Dr. Pamela Brewer.

February 5, 2016 Freedom from Guilt and Blame: Finding Self-Forgiveness Interview with Randi Fine.

December 28, 2015 10 Steps to Self-Esteem. Interview on Vancouver Recovery Radio CFRO 100.5.

November 17, 2015 Interview about narcissists and narcissistic relationships on Mental Health News and YouTube.

July 14, 2015 “Overcoming Codependency” Interview with Randi Fine, below:

June 11, 2015 Conquering Shame and Codependency. Interview with Brian Pisor, below. Read the transcript and book review.

June 10, 2014 Freedom From Shame, MyNDTALK with Dr. Pamela Brewer, below:

May 6, 2013 Listen to Codependency and Conflict. “Languages of LoveTeleseminar.
June 25, 2012 W4CY ( with Cheryl Resnick
October 6, 2012 Interview with Denise Krochta on Addicted to Addicts about Codependency and Enabling. See also my interview with Cathy Taughinbaugh on codependency and parenting, Helping Parents Find Peace.
Nov. 6, 2012 CBS Sky RadioA Moment of Change” with Sherry Gaba
October 24, 2013, 100.5 FM Interview about Codependency and couples in new sobriety on Vancouver Recovery Radio, below:

Dec. 8, 2013 Relationship Revolution Summit. On the origins of shame and its affect on relationships, below:

To listen to more talks on codependency and relationships, here and here.

October 2, 2011 Interview with Donna Marie Thompson on Bouncing Back from Divorce.


Stress Management:
Combines lecture, group discussion and exercises to explore of the symptoms and causes of stress. Participants identify beliefs, values, and behaviors that contribute to stress, and learn new coping strategies to achieve greater balance and ease in their lives.

Codependency: Designed to identify and change ineffective responses and individual behavior patterns that block happiness and fulfillment in relationships and work. Exercises and group discussion to learn various aspects of codependency, such as:

* Low self-esteem
* Caretaking Self vs. Enabling Others
* Setting Limits and Boundaries
* Self-direction vs. Dependency on Others
* Reacting to and Controlling Others
* Moving out of Guilt and Blame
* Self-Nurturing

Transformation Through Relationship: For individuals and couples. Relationships provide an opportunity to heal dysfunctional family patterns and grow in compassion for self and others. This seminar will explain:

* How couples project their shadow and parents
* How fears of abandonment and closeness create the dance of intimacy
* How to transform power struggles into compromise
* How to improve communication
* How to avoid becoming a parent or child to your partner

Moving On and Letting Go: At some point we all experience loss, whether loss of a loved one, a relationship, health or career. Group discussion and techniques help participants better understand their experience and move on. Topics include:

* The stages of loss
* Effects on identify and self-esteem
* Coping with anger, guilt and depression
* How to handle triggers and memories
* The meaning of Acceptance
* Healing and return of pleasure
* How to create a new life

Chronic Pain: Learn about the latest research and Mayo Clinic approach to chronic pain and the mind-body link in the negative feedback loop that can make pain chronic. Participants join in discussion and experiment with techniques using breath, sound, touch, and visualization to interrupt this cycle and reduce pain.

Substance Abuse: For those wanting to learn more about addiction, including family members. Topics include:

* Latest research on addiction
* Recognition of the symptoms and patterns of substance abuse
* Understand the progressive stages from substance abuse to dependency
* The role of denial and control
* The impact of addiction on all family members
* How to avoid enabling
* Tools and steps of recovery for the addict and family members
* Relapse prevention

Divorce: Lecture and group discussion covering the stages of divorce and the emotional and physical effects on parents and children, as well as suggestions for better communication, parenting and a smooth the transition to a new family definition. Topics covered:

* Coping with loss and separation
* Balancing emotional, legal and parenting concerns
* Adjusting to new family units
* Cooperative custody and visitation arrangements
* Effective parenting and co-parenting techniques
* Moving beyond divorce to healing

Women’s Issues: For women only, this is an ongoing women’s group that focuses on:

* Balancing Work and Family
* Why women get depressed
* Nurturing Self and Family
* Career Challenges for Women
* Self-esteem and Women’s roles
* Health, Aging and Sexual Issues

Meditation and Spiritual Practice: Introduction to a variety of meditative techniques from Buddhist, Yogic and Western traditions, and an explanation of the chakra system. Guidance for improving practice and avoidance of common pitfalls. Participants experiment with sound, breath, mantras, yantras, movement and visualizations to create a practice that feels right for them. Individual consultations are available upon request.

Fees & Schedule Available on Request. For more info…(see articles)